While this summer has already featured an abundance of great blockbusters, “Am I OK?” finds its worth in its subtlety. Fronted by Dakota Johnson, this film balances humour with awkward authenticity as a new addition to the ever-growing dramedy genre.
Focused on Lucy (Dakota Johnson) and her coming out, “Am I OK?” is not just a film about queerness. Instead, it uses Lucy’s acceptance of her sexuality as the catalyst for a deeper examination of all aspects of her life, including love, friendship, and the impulse to hide ourselves from the world.
A Late Bloomer’s Coming of Age
In recent years, we’ve seen a twist on the coming-of-age film, where characters are forced not to just come out to themselves, but to do so must come out to others. Films like “Love Simon” (2018), “The Prom” (2020), and “The Half of It” (2020), garnered great attention upon release, with audiences celebrating the accuracy of how teenagers grapple with their sexualities. But where are the stories for those coming to terms with these identities later in life?
Dakota Johnson’s Lucy is not your average coming-of-age protagonist. At 32 years old, she’s double the age of most of her cinematic counterparts and she feels it. She’s consistently haunted by the ability of younger people to have already discovered and accept themselves, thinking there’s something wrong with her for coming to it late.
While iconic films like “Carol” (2015) and “Brokeback Mountain” (2005) have touched on the adult perspective of queerness, “Am I OK?” is uniquely refreshing in directly tackling adulthood coming out in the 21st century. In a time when the LGBTQ+ community has become more accepted and relevant in Western culture, this film analyses the cognitive dissonance many may still feel towards their own identities. Ultimately, the question of whether she’s “okay or not” does not pertain to Lucy’s sexuality but her hesitancy to assume it when others don’t.
Finding Comedy in the Uncomfortable
While not a laugh-out-loud comedy, “Am I OK?” works in witty one-liners and irreverent scenes to contrast with its deeper subject matter. The stylings of the film’s directors are directly influential on this. The director duo of Tig Notaro and her wife Stephanie Allynne combine Notaro’s comedic observational material with Allynne’s personal experiences.
As stated by the pair in an interview with NPR, both struggled with their sexualities, but it was Allynne who felt the immense loss shared by Lucy in the film, as she says, “I felt like I found my sexuality later, but I was in my 20s. But I do really understand that feeling of, oh, my God, how did I miss this? Oh, my God, I haven’t been living an honest life, and I’m missing out on what could have been.”
The feeling of being left behind pervades the film, with Lucy commenting to her best friend Jane, “People figure this out when they’re like, 9,” when told that there’s no exact time for this experience. With the plot and perspectives of the characters tied very closely to the film’s creators, there’s a sense of deep dread and uncertainty that echos Allynne’s sentiments. While scary and upsetting, the writing and performances lovingly find the absurdity in these anxieties, culminating in a work that accepts the fear associated with finding oneself but pokes fun at the idea that there’s a “correct” timeline for doing so.
Performing the Subtle
Dakota Johnson has had a fairly interesting career. From the “Fifty Shades” trilogy to this year’s “Madame Web” (2024), it’s often unclear if she’s a less-than-compelling leading lady or just has difficulty choosing projects that suit her. “Am I OK?”, however, makes a compelling argument for the latter. In a film intentionally subtle and poignant, Johnson perfectly matches its tone, never straying for melodrama or slapstick comedy. She’s naturalistically raw and convincible as a woman coming to terms with herself and the opportunities that have passed her by. Hopefully, future performances by Johnson will take on this tone more, as its evident that she works best as an indie darling than a blockbuster babe.
Jane, Lucy’s best friend, is played by Sonoya Mizuno (“Ex-Machina,” “Civil War”). Serving as the film’s secondary protagonist, Mizuno matches Johnson in quality and intention. Together, they convince the audience that they have been best friends for years. Without Mizuno’s chemistry with Johnson, most of this movie would fall flat, so luckily her work helps define the differences that make their friendship genuine.
The rest of the cast are rounded-out comedians, helping bring levity to the film’s severity. Actors like Molly Gordon (“Theater Camp,” “The Bear”) and Sean Hayes (“Will and Grace”) perfectly portray the annoying coworker and boss respectively while Keirsey Clemons (“Dope,” “Flatliners”) plays Lucy’s love interest whose confusing intentions may be all too familiar to many queer people. In addition to directing, Notaro additionally has a cameo as the incredible Californian life coach at a spiritual retreat.
A Celebration of Female Friendship
While a coming-out film, the core of “Am I OK?” is its interaction with female friendship. Lucy and Jane’s sexuality never threatens their friendship, setting this film apart from many others aimed at younger audiences. Lucy never harbours secret feelings for Jane and Jane is never made uncomfortable by Lucy.
Instead, much of the conflict between the two is related to their attempt to understand each other as they deal with big life changes. This leads to a much more refreshing and realistic study of friendship. When discussing a scene in which the pair have a sleepover, Allynne said, “I think a lot of women relate to those moments of lying in bed with a friend or somebody, a partner, and what conversations come out in that moment.” There’s no jealousy or uneasiness surrounding Lucy’s coming out and instead, the film specifically highlights the important intimacy of female friendships regardless of sexuality.
Realising that “You Are OK”
Identifying oneself has remained difficult despite increasing acceptance. “Am I OK?” serves to dismantle preconceptions of the coming out process as well as highlighting the reluctance many have to do so. When stating, “I don’t know if I’m really that way,” Lucy exhibits the common aspect of hesitancy in the modern coming-out experience.
“Am I OK?” may not have the bones to be a classic but right now, it is incredibly relevant. Coming out in the 21st century is now much more accepted but with that, stereotypes surrounding it gained widespread prevalence. By pushing back against the “norms” of queer identity and discovery, “Am I OK?” helps garner attention to the realities of coming out, not just the perfectly “on-time” Hollywood versions. And with an emphasis on the friendship of Lucy and Jane, “Am I OK?” is not just a story of accepting oneself, but learning that there’s no one way to do it when others are beside you.
